Carl Donaree O'Briant

Carl Donaree O’Briant, 83, died on Sunday, January 5th in his long-time home of Abingdon, Virginia. His friends called him Don or, in earlier times, Donnie. His fellow golfers at the club called him “O.B.” We called him Dad and, when our kids came along, Pop Pop. If you were a waiter, what you likely called him is unprintable here, as he was famously salty and impatient.

Don’s wife, Linda, died in April of last year and, honestly, he never recovered from losing her. Don and Linda married in 2010, having found each other later in life. They were inseparable, and for a beautiful decade, lived their best lives together. Their door was always open, and friends and family constantly stopped by, greeted always by a spoiled-rotten Shih Tzu - first Bogey, then Beau. Don kept a trove of candy in his chairside table, supposedly for the kids, but everyone knew he had a serious sweet tooth. If you were ever a visitor to their condo, you experienced the kaleidoscope of multicolored glass. Don and Linda collected Blenko, an artisanal glass from West Virginia, and amassed an enviable trove that made them well known in Blenko circles. They only stopped collecting when they ran out of space to display it and energy to dust it. It was more than a hobby. It was a way for them to see the world the same way, in translucent explosions of blue, red, orange, and green. 

Don loved sports, especially college football. “I’m not a fan of the pros,” he always said. In his youth he was a three-letter athlete, and for most of his adult life an avid golfer. While a lifetime of smoking eventually forced him to give up golf, the TV was always tuned to an event of some sort: The Masters, the NCAA Wrestling Championships, any football game Nick Saban was coaching. One Christmas he took us looping around Bristol Motor Speedway in a white stretch limo, his love of sports, cars, and family collapsing into a fever dream of steep angles and colored lights. It was weird and marvelous. 

Full of contradictions, Don was whip smart but barely finished high school. Childlike but curmudgeonly. Had an easy humor but wore a constant scowl. Loved to eat but hated most foods. An attentive father but twice divorced, he wouldn’t mind us saying that he wasn’t always easy to live with. But the reward was life with a man who, despite his contradictions, loved deeply and kept us all on our toes. 

Don was born in Greensboro, North Carolina in 1941 to Sid and Jane O’Briant. His brother Jimmy came along two years later. Don outlived them all. He is survived by his children, Alex O’Briant of Maplewood, NJ and Erin Stewart of Clover, SC, and by his ex-wife Sandra O’Briant of Greensboro, NC. Three grandchildren, Izzy, Nora, and Henry, and two step-grandchildren, Treva and Liam, also carry on his legacy. 

He wasn’t much for ceremonies, so there will be no memorial service. Instead, we will hold a celebration of life for Don and Linda in Abingdon later this year. In lieu of flowers, we request only that you hold your loved ones close and call each other often. If you insist on a gesture, we would love for you to make a donation in Don and Linda’s name to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI).

Don, Dad, Pop Pop….we will miss you.